In her youth, by her father’s side,

with bold fearlessness

she rode every roller coaster ride.

She explored the wilderness,

climbed up knolls and hills,

splashed over rapids,

crashed bumper car thrills.

She jet-skied once,

swam in swift rivers & eerie lakes,

threw herself into crashing waves

with fewly took breaks.

She galloped windy horsetrails,

slid down curving water slides,

rode on antique train rails,

sat backwards in classic car rides.

Curious charisma with hawk-eye vision,

she tried anything once,

always on her own decision.

Her father encouraged and nurtured her smile,

yet her mother stagnated her identity, all the while.

Shy from fear to express,

her discouraged creativity

developed into a mess.

Her curiosity grew odd, too weird, too strange

for her mother to accept her wide interest range.

Resentment, jealosy, spitefulness, pride

stifled a child who was learning to stride.

Now she is me: A grown woman in heart–

struggling, aching, trying to make

something of this life I did not want to take.


The End is the Beginning

I have not the strength to carry the world upon my shoulders, but only the strength to tend to each day’s affairs as they come.

I have not the knowledge to solve all of my problems, but only the knowledge to know this.

I have not the identity to be anyone but my self, even as much as I still do not know her.

I have not the drive to move mountains, but the drive to walk plateaus alone.

I have not the love to change the world, but the love to change my self.

I have not the wisdom to understand the future, but the hindsight to clarify the past.

I have not the means to reach anyone’s heart, but the flexibility to harness my own.

I have not the breath to persuade anyone, but the breath to capture my own faith.

I have not the sight to see why I suffer, but the sight to see suffering is part of everything.


Aging is maturing beyond everything that once mattered in youth and not being afraid to let it go.

Aging is growing out of old problems while simultaneously acclimating with new problems.

Aging is not viewing problems as problems, but as tests of your true inner nature.

Aging is accepting what you cannot control while stopping trying to control it.

Aging is gaining wisdom, insight, clarity, understanding, virtue, character, and actualizing your individual essence of life.

Aging is not looking at yourself or others as a quantifiable number of years, but as intrinsic beings of qualitative depth.

Aging is part of dying a little more every day and embracing every breath closer to death.

Octopi, Homo sapiens, and Feral Children

Being a human being is the most challenging being to be in the world, so it seems. No other creature is so complex, intricate, or sentient as that of Homo sapiens, except maybe the octopus and/or extraterrestrials (of which octopi may be of extraterrestrial decent).

Still, octopi don’t stab, shoot, bomb, rape, or otherwise destroy and traumatize other octopi of a different color, size, or shape. Octopi don’t have to decide what’s morally/ethically correct. Every species simply flows with the cycles and seasons of Nature, each doing it’s selective part, fulfilling its role as an octopus, fish, cat, dog, wolf, bird, turtle, lizard, spider, elephant, and so forth. Does the octopus ever wonder if it belongs? If it has a purpose? If it is appreciated? If it is loved? If it is indicatively meaningful? Semantically meaningful? Significantly meaningful?
The octopus is extremely intelligent as a cephalopod, yet humans cannot know what it is thinking, if it is thinking, or how it is thinking and if its thinking determines its behaviour. Yet humans ponder their own thinking and their own meaning as humans, as individuals, and as nobodies. And this pondering somehow influences human ideas, behaviour, and social mechanism with and toward one another (Enculturation).

In civilization, duality plagues every aspect of living. We experience spirituality vs. religion, logic vs. emotion, politics vs. autonomy, consumerism vs. self-sufficiency, wages vs. debt, ethics vs. immorality, technology vs. human potential, idealism vs. pragmatism, wisdom vs. ignorance, love vs. hate, fact vs. opinion, sobriety vs. addiction, well-being vs. infirmity, meaning vs. insignificance. Dual perception is brainwashed within the construct of the human condition. The fact other life forms function around duality shows duality is not embedded within the fabric of existence, but that duality is embedded within the construct of the encultured mind. The human creates its own tools and instruments, its society, its outlook and measurement of reality, its government, its politics, laws, codes, military, religious beliefs, etc… The human is constantly impressioned by other humans.
Yet, feral humans are rarities, historically documented to be abandoned early in life, only surviving in wilderness from the benevolent care of Nature by wolves, wild dogs, bears, birds, monkeys, or any other non-Homo sapien species. Feral children do not humanistically create, decide, or believe in any instrument, outlook, government, political affiliation, religion, or philosophy. Feral children are Homo sapiens who know no language, except the mannerisms, sounds, and behaviour they observe and are taught by the wild species which took them under their wing, or paw, or hoof.

* http://listverse.com/2008/03/07/10-modern-cases-of-feral-children/

We do not see discovered feral children who are transported to live in rehabilitation centers growing up using debit cards at Wal-Mart to purchase the latest I-pad for their day-to-day amusement and societal functioning, nor does it seem they are capable of ever learning to do so. Historically, when feral human children have been discovered and introduced with humans from civilization, they did not survive long or acclimate very functionably. If a human were never exposed to religion and spirituality, they would be a human being non-influenced in any regard to holding a theological, supernatural, or otherwise abstract-mystical disposition because the conception of this would not exist, nor would a scientific, logical, rational, or political influence exist, such as how it is for the feral child.
One would be conditioned in all ways to communicate like the species which saved them. And wolves, bears, wild dogs, etc… as far as humans can perceive, do not believe in Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Yahweh, Brahman, Krishna, etc… Same if one were never exposed to technology. The construct that something could be done better and faster with a technological device wouldn’t exist because the feral child only knows how to do what the child knows he/she can do on his/her own. To be feral is the most raw and wildest form of humanity that humanity has ever witnessed. This is who humans are documented to be when they are isolated and not influenced by what the majority of humanity has made, corrupted, and abstracted. Feral humans, in all their rarity, surely must be the closest to purity in understanding life and essence for what it is. Yet, like the wolves, bears, and love from Nature which accepted the child as one of their own, they cannot communicate it.